Last night as I was clipping a billion coupons I turned to PBS to see what was on. I immediately got sucked into Tess of the d'Urbervilles, which was originally a novel written by Thomas Hardy and published in 1891. (See? Wiki-awesome.) But I was wiki-pissed when I realized that what I watched was just the first episode of a miniseries on Masterpiece Classics and I was gonna have to wait an entire week to see the next segment. I also remembered I'm going to be out of town next Sunday night and was therefore able to justify reading the entire synopsis on Wikipedia, all the way to the bitter end.
And when I say bitter, I mean bitter.
Thomas Hardy was seriously disturbed you guys. This is the most depressing story I've ever read. I was wondering how I'd be able to fall asleep after learning the fate of Tess the milkmaid, and then I remembered the voiceover dude saying the next miniseries will be Wuthering Heights. I've never read it, and for some reason I thought that one might be less depressing, so I hit up my new best wiki-friend... big mistake. What's with these old school authors? Is a nice, murder-free love story with a few twists and turns followed by a warm and fuzzy happy ending too much to ask for crying out loud?
I am glad that I discovered my own little version of wiki-Cliff's Notes so that I didn't waste many more hours falling in love with Tess only to see what becomes of her and that wussy guy who convinced her to marry him and then kicked her to the curb. I'm really okay. Really. I just need a wiki-pick me up in the form of trashy reality TV that doesn't end with a lynching.
So... will it be Momma's Boys or True Beauty? Decisions, decisions.