my apologies

I'd like to apologize to society in general for being an obnoxious teenager once in my life. I find it difficult to believe that my friends and I were ever as silly as the three girls in Blockbuster tonight... and yet somehow I have visions of us drawing attention to ourselves in every public place that we visited. Sure, it was fun at the time... but now I understand with much greater clarity the stares and glares of, well, pretty much everyone.

Tonight, I was the mean pregnant woman in line behind them, tapping my foot and clearing my throat while the booty-shorts wearing giggle twits tried to decide whether they wanted like two bags of gummi worms or like one bag of gummi worms and one bag of Skittles. The fact that their queen bee notified me that she would only be like another 26 seconds didn't make up for the 7.5 minutes I had already sacrificed to the candy gods. The other 5 people in line behind me were even less amused... and the poor cashier. He actually mouthed "I'm sorry" to me while they were trying to figure out how much money they would save by buying the Twizzlers instead of the Skittles.

I made a well thought out and not at all rash decision during that 7.76 minutes that if and when I have daughters they will not be allowed to have friends. Problem solved.

And I really am sorry, society. Truly I am.


thursday musings

1. The most unintentionally funny commercial currently on television:
The Botox commercial where the poor lady is trying to make all of these crazy expressions to "prove" that you can raise your eyebrows once you've had Botox. The only problem is, she *can't* raise her eyebrows and only ends up looking ridiculous. Cracks me up every time.

2. Who was the drunk a-hole who pounded on our door at 4:13am this morning? It takes me long enough to fall asleep now when I haven't had the Be-Jeebus scared out of me. And additionally, I have a sleeping baby and the standing rule is "Wake Him, Take Him." Trust me, you do NOT want to be on the business end of that.

3. Ocean now repeats just about any word you ask him to. Except "Mommy." When I ask him to say Mommy he says "Up!" This may answer any questions about why my back is constantly killing me.

4. If you live in Ann Arbor and are going to cut down a tree on your property it's probably a good idea to notify the neighbors first. Otherwise they might get pissed and call the police (who can't do anything anyway because removing trees on private property is not illegal).

5. 2.5 more weeks until we go to the beach! Moms, if you travel you have to check out this site. I'm hoping it makes our stay much more enjoyable to have an actual crib for Ocean so we don't have to fight the pack-n-play battle (as in he'd rather play than sleep in that thing).


croup is the devil.

I'm very thankful for all of my babysitting and nannying experience before having children because if it weren't for caring for a croupy baby already I would have been flipping out last night.

For the last two nights my little baby boy has been up with a croupy cough, which is basically a lot of barking and wheezing sounds. Last night he didn't even fall asleep until midnight and then was up just about every hour until 7:30 this morning. It's the most terrible thing when your child is sick and crying and can't be consoled. He didn't even want his pacifier or his duckie, which is completely unheard of. I held him, I walked around with him and I tried to lay down with him but he just cried and cried and if you've ever experienced croup you know crying makes it a hundred times harder for them to breathe. So we spent much of the night last night in a steamy bathroom, or as I like to call it the Sick Baby Sauna (which sounds much more glamorous).

What is it about being awake in the middle of the night with a baby who is ill, that makes you feel as though you will never sleep again? Logically I know that he will eventually be better and we will all return to sleep-filled nights and well-rested days but in the middle of the night there's an incredible hopelessness that I'm doomed to eternally walk around like night of the living dead and things will never return to normal.

And then I start to become very fearful of adding another baby to the mix. What happens when they are both sick at the same time? How will I handle caring for two during those trying nights, but also during the days when I'm running on empty? And what if I get sick also? What then?

And then morning comes, and I drag myself out of bed to take a shower and begin my day, and all of those worries just fade into the night. I feel this gentle reminder in my spirit that there's a reason I only have one child at this moment, and that's because right now I am equipped to handle the one I have. I have to trust that by the time number two arrives, I will be prepared for two. But as for right now one is all I need to worry about.

So I could use lots of prayers that tonight will be a better night for both of us and also that God will give me what I need right when I need it so that when number two arrives I'll be prepared and won't already be flipping out about number three.


war on "drugs"

From CNN.com:
ATLANTA, Georgia (CNN) -- The prescription drugs allegedly found in Al Gore III's possession Wednesday are favorites among young people, according to drug abuse experts, who say prescription drugs may soon overtake street drugs in popularity.

Some young people perceive that prescription drugs are safer than street drugs, experts say.

"I wouldn't be surprised if right now at this point in time, there are more kids abusing prescription drugs than abusing marijuana," said Joseph A. Califano Jr., chairman and president of CASA, the National Center on Alcohol and Substance Abuse at Columbia University. Gore was arrested on charges of possessing -- in addition to marijuana -- Vicodin, Xanax, Valium and Adderall...

...Another appeal to prescription drugs, besides the easy access, is that young people often perceive them as safer.

"They don't have to go to the streets and deal with some guy they don't know and get marijuana where they don't know what's in it," Califano said. "Also, they see their parents using these drugs, so they seem safe."

Jack said prescription drugs can be more challenging to treat than addiction to street drugs. "In traditional drug abuse, addicts can say, 'I've been using meth or coke or pot,' and an addiction specialist knows what to do," she said. But with prescription drugs, "sometimes the kids don't even know what they've been taking. They just pass the pills around."

Part of the solution would be for drug makers to formulate their products so they're harder to abuse, said Califano, adding that anti-drug campaigns also should focus more on prescription drug abuse.

Parents need to do their part as well, he said. "When I was a kid in Brooklyn, when parents had liquor, they locked up the liquor cabinet," he said. "Maybe parents need to lock up the medicine cabinet."

And from an article written by Erin Hildebrandt for Mothering Magazine:
(Our kids) need every shred of information we can give them, so that they do not choose to huff butane or snort heroin simply because they survived smoking the joint we told them was dangerous, and because they therefore assume we must be lying about the rest.